I feel like I'm definitely sitting at the same place I have been for a while. Actually it's the reason I blog like I've said so many times before. Just trying to define myself. Figure out what makes me and who I want to be.
I had a friend who contacted me about a year ago after I hadn't seen him for quite a while. This is what I wrote him back. I'm a pro at dishing out advice that I find hardest to follow myself:
Just take things one day at a time. enjoy the journey and don't be so worried about the destination. I've made a lot of mistakes and really messed up in the past. But I guess lately I've realized you have to stop looking back and just move forward. You have to do things for yourself and stop worrying about what other people may or may not think because they don't really matter anyway.
I think for a great deal of my life people put me up on a pedestal or expected perfection from me and I hated that. At the same time that didn't mean that I needed to prove my imperfection. I was trying to see myself through their eyes rather than how God sees me. He sees all my flaws, all my human faults and desires and loves me just the same because with him all of those mistakes are erased and forgotten. You just have to remember what he thinks of you, not what the world thinks. and thats a really really hard thing to do.
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